Toxic Positivity (And How To Avoid It)

Toxic positivity is when we always maintain a overly positive mindset, no matter what’s going on. While the acts of toxic positivity do often come from good intentions, it is important to know where to draw the line. In this article I will go through the concept of toxic positivity, why it won’t help you and how to avoid it!

Table of contents:

What is toxic positivity?

Toxic positivity is when we keep a positive mindset at all times β€” no matter how dire the situation may be. It includes ignoring, suppressing and/or neglecting negative emotions or experiences.

A person that insists on positive thinking all the time, even though something awful happened (either to themselves or someone else), is a huge sign of toxic positivity. Acts of toxic positivity are often well intended, as focusing on a positive mindset is not a bad thing at all. But as the word toxic indicates, it’s like a “too much of a good thing” where the thing becomes so excessive to a point it’s overwhelming β€” and even harmful.

Why do we resort to toxic positivity?

Toxic positivity stems from an avoidance of negative emotions or experiences. A person who is uncomfortable around these kind of feelings might find toxic positivity a way to cope β€” so yes, toxic positivity is a coping mechanism.

Why toxic positivity is harmful (and won’t help you)

While a positive mindset is beneficial in many aspects of our life, we still have to come to terms with our other feelings in order to work through them. Believe me, they will come bite you in the back if you neglect them.

Suppressing our emotions in any type or way is harmful for your mental health, and in the case of toxic positivity, it may even be harmful for those around you.

Telling someone to ”just cheer up” or ”that a positive mindset will fix everything” when they just went something awful is invalidating and shallow. It’s like a false reassurance, and actually dismisses emotions instead of affirming them. This is harmful for the person being invalidated, although it’s usually not intended that way.

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Toxic positivity and manifestation

Toxic positivity is unfortunately a common thing when it comes down to manifesting our desires. If you are already familiar with the concept of manifestation, I am sure you have heard all about how a positive mindset will get you anything you desire. Although this is true to some extent, it’s extremely important to know where to draw the line.

A common misconception is that we need to positive all the time in order for our desires to manifest, and that we ever feel negative it immediately slows down our manifestation. When it comes down to manifesting our desires, it’s most important to feel good about the thing you’re manifesting (read How To Manifest: Beginner’s Guide to learn more). This obviously doesn’t mean we should keep all our negative feelings inside because we want to ”stay positive”.

When we suppress our negative emotions, we will not be able to enter the state of receiving. We have to clean up any internal blockages first if we truly want to manifest what we want into reality.

We all experience setbacks at some point in our lives, so it’s actually impossible to feel or be happy all the time. Life is all about balance, because how else can we appreciate the finer things in life? Even the Law of Delicate Balance speaks about this. Not familiar with the 7 laws of attraction? Learn more here.

How to avoid toxic positivity

So, how to avoid toxic positivity? If you’re guilty of toxic positivity, it’s important to understand that true happiness doesn’t come from suppressing negative emotions. Even in terms of manifesting our desires, we will have to put the inner work in first before we can fully use the laws of attraction to our benefit.

One way to start is by getting in touch with yourself and begin recognizing that the negative experiences you went through need to be affirmed. If you notice any negative feelings showing up, don’t try to shove them away or start judging yourself for it. It’s important to observe your thoughts without losing yourself in them. By becoming aware of what you think and feel, you will be able to understand yourself better and give yourself the validation needed.

If you are dealing with someone in your environment who displays acts of toxic positivity, it’s important to communicate this with the person in question. Usually, people who display acts of toxic positivity mean well! By communicating you feel invalidated and expressing your feelings, you are also setting boundaries. If you are uncomfortable having that conversation for any reason, remember that it is okay to prioritize yourself and your mental health (especially if the person in question is someone you are not close with) and walk away.

Takeaway

Toxic positivity and the denial of negative emotions will not lead to anything good long-term. Even in terms of manifestation, toxic positivity is harmful for ourselves and the people around us. Are you guilty of toxic positivity? Or have you encountered a toxic positive person? Comment down below to let me know!

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